Tuesday, January 7, 2014

Continuing Tales from a Teenage Alcoholic: Where Did All the Light Bulbs Go?

Sis 1 here . . .

My favorite New Year's "memory" is that of 1984.  Sis 2, and I stayed at our friend's house (we'll call her Apple Girl).  Apple Girl's mom went out of town for the holiday, and trusted Apple Girl to stay home and take care of her younger brother.  Of course, we all thought we were doing that while having a fantastic New Year's Eve party. 

We started drinking early in the afternoon and by 9:00 pm, I was on the bathroom floor, bowing to the porcelain god.  By 10:00 pm, I was passed out on that same floor.  How sad, I was going to miss midnight, the ball drop, and Dick Clark.  I had help though, another friend (we'll call him Texas) picked me up off the floor and carried me into the living room so that I could do the final countdown with everyone.  Thanks, Texas!

The best part though, is the next morning, as we are hung over and cleaning up, Apple Girl's mom calls and says she is on the way home.  She's early!  Shit!  So, we frantically clean it all up and get out so that Apple Girl won't get into trouble.  We don't hear anything from her for days.  Finally, when we get back to school on Monday, we find out that (1) we cleaned too well, so mom knew something was up, and (2) someone stole every frigging light bulb from the house, and Apple Girl had no explanation.  Needless to say, Apple Girl's mom didn’t want her hanging around with us any more.

The good thing is that we are all still friends today and can look back and laugh about it all.  The bad thing is, we have children who are just like us.  Yikes!

Until next time, keep it #sassyandsarcastic . . . .


  1. LOL too funny. What goes around comes around….and yes, I have 2 daughters who do the same shit I did at their age. Holy crap.

    1. And now we drink because of the children. LOL! Thanks for stopping by, Menopausal Mama.

      Sis 1